so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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