real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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