I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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