my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize