sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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