I have demons in me.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
