No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
