This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
