I think I just saw someone hide a body.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
