do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize