Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize