we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He did a backflip because drugs
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