It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize