All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
