this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize