Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
