I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize