The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i will never coherently bang her
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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