This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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