Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
