he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
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