Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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