he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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