respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
