Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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