You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Randomize
