i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
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