Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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