if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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