I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
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