i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Randomize
