Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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