She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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