Texts From Last Night

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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I feel like death. Did you die last night?

  (305): View more from Florida

  Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus

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  (859): I feel like death. Did you die last night? (305): Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta! (859): unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus http://tfl.nu/lgid
  Replies (8) Good night (2090) Bad night (534)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.

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  (434): Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future. http://tfl.nu/4ejh
  Replies (32) Good night (1629) Bad night (3870)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.

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  (248): new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home. http://tfl.nu/dmz8
  Replies (49) Good night (5306) Bad night (2165)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.

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  (803): definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him. http://tfl.nu/8psn
  Replies (23) Good night (710) Bad night (4400)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.

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  (203): The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this. http://tfl.nu/mzic
  Replies (6) Good night (823) Bad night (4309)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.

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  (828): I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office. http://tfl.nu/0hvj
  Replies (7) Good night (1413) Bad night (3708)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.

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  (203): The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of. http://tfl.nu/765v
  Replies (4) Good night (4229) Bad night (721)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.

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  (613): Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big. http://tfl.nu/u6h6
  Replies (15) Good night (6967) Bad night (756)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level

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  (516): I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level http://tfl.nu/2gco
  Replies (3) Good night (1984) Bad night (945)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this

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  (913): Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this http://tfl.nu/urxm
  Replies (11) Good night (777) Bad night (1380)
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  (619): View more from California

  Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.

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  (619): Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that. http://tfl.nu/6d83
  Replies (7) Good night (984) Bad night (678)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first

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  (412): I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first http://tfl.nu/vbea
  Replies (4) Good night (1414) Bad night (472)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public

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  (248): About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public http://tfl.nu/nrsv
  Replies (5) Good night (542) Bad night (276)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.

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  (309): All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk. http://tfl.nu/b2p3
  Replies (2) Good night (469) Bad night (223)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.

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  (406): So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad. http://tfl.nu/q68j
  Replies (0) Good night (153) Bad night (290)

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