yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
