That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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