I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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