Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
There are leaves in my underwear?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
