so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I am one with the molecules
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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