i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
