I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
