Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
