Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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