By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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