Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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