I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
