dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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