Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
