if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
