turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
