DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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